I am reminded about how foolish it is to make plans and to think way in to the future. A week and a half ago, I was on vacation, sitting in the recliner, drinking a cup of coffee and visiting with my mom and her boyfriend, as they were visiting from Ohio. It started off as any regular morning in our home, the routine of waking up, my stumbling to the coffee pot, Emily putting on the kettle to boil water for tea. The boys were awake. 8 month old Declan playing in the play pen, smiling and jabbering away, Caleb still waking up and not quite ready to face the day yet. Emily went to the computer to check her facebook, and I heard her exclaim, "What is this?" She was asking me to translate what had been said on Marcos Kurrle's facebook page, and as I read, I did not want to believe what I was seeing. Two of our dear friends had been killed in a horrible automobile accident. 36 year old Julie Kurrle and six year old son Timi had died that morning, as they were going to get their paperwork in order in preparation for their visit to the States.
I did not want for this to be true, as I'm sure many others were wishing the same thing. In my mind, I began to re-live my relationship with Julie and her husband Norberto.
The initial encounter
In 1998 I made my first missionary visit to Paraguay, South America. The first person I met when I stepped off the plane was Norberto. He was assigned to be my companion for my journey from Asuncion, to the village of Raul Pena. We instantly hit it off. We are close in age and it felt as if I had picked up a long dormant friendship, and we resumed right where we left off. He introduced me to Mate, the strong tea that is the drink of the Paraguayans. We discussed the "luxuries" of traveling by bus through this country and we talked about the culture and the people and the churches that I would be visiting.
I spent my first three weeks in this beautiful, tiny country living in the parsonage with Norberto. We talked about the Bible, our faith, the differences and difficulties, bot of living in Paraguay and of living in the States. He talked about Julie! He told me of how much he cared for her and how deeply he wanted to spend the rest of his life with this beautiful young woman that had captivated his heart, and we prayed. All to quickly, my time had come to an end, and as I boarded the plane, my heart broke knowing that I may never see my dear friend again.
Fast Forward
A short time later, as Norberto was studying at Anderson, he and I once again rekindled our friendship and I had the honor of attending the wedding of Norberto and Julie in Indiana. I could immediately see that there was something truly special about Julie. The way she and Norb complimented each other, and how the interacted was truly blessing to a single man still searching for his soul-mate. Julie and Norberto were truly soul-mates! Many years had passed since I last saw Norberto and Julie and I often wondered how they were doing and how their ministry was going at the radio and in their other ventures. Through the miracles of Facebook, I was able to "friend" them and to follow their life and their adventures and to see Timi grow before the eyes of their facebook friends. How I longed to see my friends again!
God is amazing!
March of 2010, while attending the Virginia State Youth convention, Mark Shaner and I were talking and sharing about some of our missionary trips and I mentioned that I had been to Paraguay twice. He looked at me and said that there was a group going in October and invited my wife and I to be part of that team that would represent Spread the Word Ministries.
I knew instantly that I would be going, and then my heart sunk, because I was unsure that my wife would go. A couple of weeks later, she came to me and said, "I'm in." I said into what? Her response; the trip to Paraguay. I was so excited! I sent a message to Julie and Norberto saying that we were coming and that I was looking forward to she and Emily meeting and to meet Timi as well.What a trip! Emily fell in love with Julie and Timi instantly and Timi helped her with the pain of being away from our son for so long.
Several of the team stayed at Julie and Norb's house while we were in Obligado, and Julie asked me to re-attach some hooks so she could hang up her curtains in their bedroom and to fix a shelf that had fallen. I was more than happy to oblige and I asked if there was anything else I could do. She was worried about being an inconvenience! I was there to serve and to help and she wanted me to spend time with the rest of the group and to rest. She was always thinking of others. Timi was a ball of energy that night. Wanting to show us his pet toad, which by the way slept in the room where my wife and I were sleeping, and to show us his books and toys and asked a million questions about our little boy! We went to tour the radio station and to have dinner with the youth ministry team for Paraguay. On our way home, Timi and I walked hand in hand, back to their home and he would tell me all the things he learned in school and ask more questions about whatever popped in to his head at that moment. What a beautiful little boy!
Planning Ahead
When we returned home, we showed all of the pictures to our son Caleb and he looked at us and asked if he too could go to Paraguay some day, because he wanted to play with Timi. We assured him that we would go, that they could play together and that we would do it soon. Then we made the decision to go the North American Convention of the Church of God, in Anderson In. I asked Julie if they would be there and much to my delight, they were to be home this summer. I was excited at the prospect of our sons meeting and on catching up with my friends. Then the news that broke my heart.
I cannot imagine the pain of losing a spouse, but to intensify that with the loss of a child as well. I cannot grasp what that must feel like and I pray that I never do. My heart is heavy, some days I am ok, others I hurt so intensely that I feel like my heart is being ripped from my body. I know that God is good and that His ways are not ours, but I wish that he could help me understand why? I hurt for my friend and for the beautiful family that was left behind. I grieve for their loss and I pray that they find comfort in their faith and in their support of one another.
Julie and Timi, you are missed and we cannot wait to see you again. This time will pass by quickly and then there will be a great reunion in Heaven.
Until then,
The Potters
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